Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
