Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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