I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
