Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
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