I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
