guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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