so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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