Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
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