Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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