Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Randomize
