i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
