somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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