the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I'm like, not good at living.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
