YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
