these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
