I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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