Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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