Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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