Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
