it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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