If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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