Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Randomize
