She announced her abortion via fbk
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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