I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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