cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
