i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
