dude i'm inner monologue high
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
