how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
