You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
