Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Randomize
