so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
