Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
How drunk are you?
Completed.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
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