Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
