Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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