I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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