but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
