you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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