Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize