I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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