whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
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