Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(386): View more from Florida

I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.

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(505): View more from New Mexico

I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.

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(704): View more from North Carolina

we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over

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(607): View more from New York

i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?

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(708): View more from Illinois

sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed

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(757): View more from Virginia

He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat

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(701): View more from North Dakota

and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

new district manager is here. you need to come in early

(630): View more from Illinois

5th mimosa says otherwise

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(561): View more from Florida

I'm drunk and he's still weird.

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