no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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