o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
