I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
