how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize
