Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize