covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
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