Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
