i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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