im gay
i know
yea but for you.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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