she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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